Rhinestone Earrings.

IMAG1964_1I avoid most of my high school classmates. There are only a few that I both like & think are interesting enough to talk to. But recently a classmate – I’ll call her Molly – has been popping into the bar to visit me. She was one of the popular crowd in high school – prom court, cheerleading – & although we were always nice to each other, I didn’t really hang with her crowd.

So apparently she’s been through a lot & her brain is pretty destroyed. She was pretty, but I guess not that smart, & right out of high school, her rich boyfriend dumped her (probably for college). I think she simply didn’t know what else to do with herself, so she got into an escort service because it was easy with her looks.

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A Shot of Infused Badness

These are pictures from 2007; I dug them up for a friend & thought I’d share them again.

Snake wine is, without a doubt, the most disgusting thing I’ve ever tasted, or ever had in my mouth for that matter.   At one time we had some friends who made regular trips to China & would bring back bottles of snake wine.   As far as I know, folks aren’t allowed to bring bottles of snake wine back to the US… but our friends had ways.   Oh yes, they did.

The bottles our friends always brought back had what appeared to be cobras in them.   I actually know very little of snakes but I assume if it’s got a hood, it’s a cobra.   My understanding is that when drinking this particular snake wine we are also drinking the snake’s venom, & I did notice immediate numbness on my lips the first time I tried it.   That evening I didn’t feel any alcoholic effects, but I did have to call people & apologize the next day for saying things I shouldn’t have said (worse than usual).

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If The Bartender Cards You

I wasn’t going to card this guy, but he was displaying “card me” behavior.

Upon entering he seated himself on the bar, & then refused to make eye contact with me, looking to his left & right, until I was standing right in front of him, saying “Hi, can I get you something?”   At this, he glanced at me, then looked back down to the side & asked for a Coors Light.

Behavior like this, to me, can mean certain things:

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Hating On Asia

This post is dedicated to my good friend who volunteers his time on Sundays to barback & run karaoke for me, who just informed me (after I had already posted this) that Asia was actually “really nice” on Friday.   So, maybe there is hope!

I work at a tiny 5 table bar on Sundays.   The place is dead until 10ish & then usually fairly merry by 11.   On Sundays we normally only see the same people – all cool people who didn’t know each other at first but are now all friends.   It’s the Sunday community.   I’ve put effort into building it, welcoming nice people & icing the disruptive ones.   It gives me a less than stellar reputation but like I give a shit.   My Sunday regulars are happy, & more than one person has expressed to me how enjoyable Sunday nights are compared to other nights.

When I say that I “ice” the disruptive ones, I mean that I inform them, matter of factly, that they are being disruptive, which is apparently enough of a crime against humanity that they leave in a huff & don’t come back.   I don’t insult, name call, or even raise my voice.   I just tell them the truth.   In response to this, I’ve been flipped off, been called a “fucking bitch,” & been accused of a number of things – racism, incompetence, stupidity – but mostly all while they were leaving, which works out for everyone.   Don’t let the door hit you on your way out.

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Bar tipping.

0000gratuityHow much you tip in a restaurant is loosely based on the amount of your tab.   The accepted minimum is 15%.   There are cheap folks who like to preach the literal translation of the word “gratuity” in order to escape even that, but what they don’t realize (or are ignoring) is the fact that tipped servers’ minimum wages are lower than everyone else’s, & that regardless of what you tip them, the IRS is going to ASSUME that they made a certain amount of “gratuity” based on their sales & they will be taxed on it.   So that server is counting on that tip.   But yeah, there is no law forcing you not to be a cheapskate.

It gets more complicated & less complicated when it comes to bar tips, though.

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