My heart is broken.

Sometimes, in the midst of joy & laughter & wonder, something unexpected happens & your heart just… breaks.
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Saving Grace: Lauren’s Delayed Reaction

GraceI saw Saving Grace awhile back, when it first came out on DVD (I don’t have tv so I see everything afterward).   Loved it, was saddened by the finale, which was obviously crippled by a network greed storyus interruptus, forcing the writers to shoot their load all at once, quite sloppily & with great – I get the feeling – despair.   Just finished watching it again on Netflix (thank you, Netflix; I like you a lot).   Still just as annoyed with the ending.

It’s important to remember that this series was about a soul headed for Hell redeeming herself, & that her final choice to sacrifice herself accomplished that.   It’s just the lack of build up & the plethora (yes, I used that word) of loose ends that have got everyone frustrated.

I’ve read posts by viewers who feel Hut Flanders’ “death” is irrelevant; I’m undecided. For those wondering how an explosion would kill him if bullets did not, IMO it took an act of good to kill him, rather than an act of malice: the bullets were just Grace having a little fun… I think we all enjoyed it at least a little.   But her denial of Flanders’ deal, giving up herself – that was an altruistic, if defiant, act of good.

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Portlock 1989I saved someone’s life once.

In the early 90s, I was at a big party some of my college buddies were throwing, & I pulled a girlfriend out of a car.   I hadn’t seen her since graduation, & after a brief reunion at the party, I’d seen her disappear with a guy I knew was bad news.   Some stupid sixth sense told me to go rescue her, so I went outside & yanked her drunk ass out of his car & told him to get lost.   I told her the party was over for her & I was going to drive her home.

That wasn’t the moment I saved her life though.   Ron was a total choad (pretty, witty, & smart… & a big fat misogynist womanizer), but not dangerous.

At the prospect of being taken home, she broke into tears & the whole sordid tale of her life since I’d last seen her spilled out – abusive drug dealer boyfriend who forced a pipe into her face & raped her with beer bottles, desertion by her family, no job, no home.   So I took her home with me, to the UH dorms.   I was in the apartments, so we had a couch.

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Disclaimer: it’s supposed to be tsu, with a little macron over the u, but too bad.

I’ve hated Facebook for a long time but I spend too much of my life there.   Most of us do.   And as time goes on, there are more & more ads, no longer confined to the sides of the interface but now even clogging up our newsfeeds.   And this is after the updated Timeline format which makes just a single post take up your entire fricking monitor so that you can no longer get an overview of what your friends are doing, but are instead forced to have only a single (or sometimes 1.5) post – super big & in your face – at a time.   And then there have been all the privacy disrespects.   Yes, I’m using a verb as a noun, & Facebook is the inspiration for this.   There’s poetry in that, but let’s talk about Tsu.

Tsu is another social platform, in its infancy.   Here’s a screenie of what the general interface looks like:

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On ending a friendship

Yeah yeah… I’m in a bad mood.   And I probably dropped a bunch of displaced anger on this guy because I’m dealing with a full-on Narcissistic Personality Disorder jerkface for a few more weeks.   But I mean it – when you end a friendship, if it ever had anything real to it, you say something to the other person.   Say goodbye, for chrissakes.   If you don’t, then you’re chickenshit.   Sorry, no other word for it. Chickenshit.

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